Big Coyote Energy

Five people have told me "But I thought you'd like it!" In their own defense after they violated my consent, or had done something in play that we did not discuss. I'll speak about different things that have happened to me over the course of my involvement in the BDSM/Kink lifestyle. I've been active in the scene for about 4 years. I'm leaving the locations and names private so that I can cross post this to fettle. Feel free to PM me for the fet names of who these people were, except 2. I never got their fet name. The first time I ever encountered someone who did something non-consensually to me, I was at a public dungeon party at (now defunct but renamed) venue. I was negotiating a knife scene with someone I had never played with before, and part of our negotiation was them asking me the question "Are you ok with knives around your pussy?" I was, and informed them that I was fine with knives near my crotch. During this scene, this person took ...

This blog explains consent really, really well. You should read it. If you’re still struggling, just imagine instead of initiating sex, you’re making them a cup of tea.  You say “hey, would you like a cup of tea?” and they go “omg fuck yes, I would fucking LOVE a cup of tea! Thank you! * ” then you know they want a cup of tea.