Skip to main content

I've been told that my consent isn't enough.

I was asked to put this in a writing:

There was more of this that I wanted to address, but people have already gotten there. The one thing that is missing is this:
These people are not healthy. Even if it is consensual. Consent doesn't make it OK to do harm.

This is another way to say "bottoms have no agency." Or "bottoms are damaged people." STOP IT. JUST STOP. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.

Consent is exactly what makes it okay to do harm. Stop telling people that consent isn't enough. Because if consent is not enough than we are not adults and have no right to partake in any of this. I'm upset and frustrated at this train of thought being continued.

It's been MONTHS of this; Bottoms can't consent. Bottoms can't this, or can't that. Bottoms are damaged people. Etc, etc, etc.

Consent is what we do. Consent is what we deal with. If you aren't ok with someone else giving consent for an act, then you know what you do?

You fucking leave.

You take your two feeties,  your toys, your stuff and you turn around and walk away.

If you have a question about consent violation, or abuse? Find the appropriate person, persons or group to take it to. But stop disguising it as this fear mongering, submissive/bottom-you-can't-handle-yourself bullshit.

Figure out your actual problem and go address that. Stop blaming edge play for abuse. Edge players aren't any more damaged than non-edge players. Wanting to engage in edge-play is not a mental illness.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

DOSC21: On Coyotes, Collars and Camp.

 Yes this is a camp writing, just bear with me.  I haven’t tagged people because I haven’t gotten permission, so if you ID yourselves or want me to specify you, let me know and I will include you <3  [ **Content warning: loss/loneliness/grief/depression]** --- I keep no secrets on my identifier as a coyote. Something that has started to make more and more sense as time passes. I’ve been using a coyote or coyote hybrid as a personal character of mine for at least 15 years, probably a lot longer if I actually go do the math. Originally, I picked Coyote as my inner creature because I didn’t feel powerful or magestic enough to be a wolf or other distinguished canine. I knew I wasn’t meant to be a dog, domesticated and immersed in service and obedience. A coyote always seemed to fit. Not a large and powerful predator, but a predator all the same. Adaptable and curious, and a spectacular example of duality. Coyote mythos shows a creature who learns lesson after lesson at the...

The deep end

Warning: edge play of all varieties mentioned. If it isn't your thing, i'd suggest turning back now. I think it's time i've accepted a few labels for myself; masochist, edge player, sick-fuck. Sexual guilt is actually something i've never dealt with before. I've always been very "on my own terms." I lost my virginity at 17 to a boy i really loved because we decided it was a good time for us (he was a virgin too, and a year younger than me). It was a good experience and we were together for a long time but i knew it wouldn't be forever. We're still friends to this day, he's pretty cool. I went through a "slut phase" in college because i felt like it and wanted to. My sexual partners (at the time) were all really cool about it. I had my first MFM threesome and OTHER people were so mad! How dare i let them take advantage of me! ...Excuse me? It was my fucking idea. We were sitting in a hot tub, chilling out (we may have been dr...

early updates

Fixed up the logo and tossed it on a few shirts in spreadshirt (link at the bottom of the page). I love how it looks now. Fun fact about the name "erotic wet atomic" it wasn't originally sexual in nature. The words erotic wet atomic are actually from Eve6 lyrics. The Moar You Knowwww******** One internets to those who know which song.